If you’re a true foodie like us, then the ultimate dream is to travel across different states, eating different amazing dishes.

Obviously, Kano, one of Nigeria’s biggest cities- is home to some of the yummiest dishes ever.

And because we love you, we’ll be showing y’all foodies the recipe for Miyan Taushe (Pumpkin soup) and Gurasa (Flat bread)- this dish feeds 6 people with less than N2000- you’re welcome.

1. For the soup, you’ll need:

2. For the Gurasa, you’ll also need:

3. And guess what? Everything costs a total of N1750 only!

4. First off, wash and chop all your vegetables for the Miyan Taushe.

5. Next, mix all dry ingredients (flour, salt, sugar and yeast) for the Gurasa in a bowl.

6. Add warm water to the mix and knead the stiff dough.

7. Cooking the Gurasa is a lot like flipping pancakes.

8. Once they cook, stack them up and get on with cooking the Miyan Taushe.

9. You need to blend your pepper and some pumpkin (Kabiwa) together – save some pumpkin pieces for your pot.

10. Next, fry the onions in palm oil for a bit then bring all the Miyan Taushe ingredients to cook- except the vegetables, of course.

11. After a few minutes, add your vegetables! That’s your spinach and Yakwa.

12. Time for the secret and most important ingredient *drumroll* Maggi cubes!

13. Let it all sit on low heat for ten minutes, and you’re all done.

14. And that’s how you make a great Northern dish for six people with less than N2,000.

If this story is too long for you, you can catch the recipe in the video below:

15. You can also keep up with many more interesting dishes from all over Nigeria on Delicious Naija, from Maggi Nigeria.

Make sure to look out for the ‘Delicious Naija’ show at these times on your TV:  7:30 pm, Friday on Arewa24,  7:30 pm, Saturday on Africa Magic (Family) , 5 pm, Sunday on NTA,   OR just watch it online right now!

1. This person that doesn’t want to accept that Tboss is an olodo

2. This person that wants to finish all his credit on Big Brother

3. See marketing skills o!

4. This person that is cursing up and down because of Tboss

5. These Efe followers are wilding

6. Not a playing stuff

7. This person teaching us how to spell Bisola

8. This guys that had to make it a church matter for Team Efe

9. Wow!!!

10. How many people will Efe share this money with?

11. Hay God! See how they turned Tboss into humanitarian

12. See campaign before election

13. This oversabi Landlord

14. … and this epic reply

15. This person that wants us to use our kidneys to vote

1. Your set probably wasn’t the worst set the school ever experienced, don’t mind your principal!

2. When it finally clicks that your birthday is in June, but your parents married in March

3. When you’re the one now paying for your phone, and you realise you don’t actually need a new phone when a new model comes out every year

4. Lowkey, you kind of needed the cane your parents gave you growing up

5. When you realise why your brother used to send you to buy sweets and lock the doors, when his girlfriend came to visit

6. When you realise you’ve finally turned to your parents when you start telling your children to tell visitors daddy isn’t at home on weekends

7. When your children are asking you to buy meat pie for them in the car, and you realise how sweet it is to tell them there’s rice at home

1. When it’s your birthday and your parents bring your cake to school, but it isn’t as big as Tunde in Primary 2b’s own

The big size of this one is now birthday dinners sha.

2. Remember how you almost killed yourself because your girlfriend in SS 2 stopped picking your midnight calls?

The problems that this midnight calls caused ehn!

3. That one is even small, that your boyfriend in year 2 that you were ready to die for, is this not you living , 5 boyfriends after?

All that nonsense drama for nothing. see yourself?!

4. Who else did overnight for Common Entrance examinations?

Lol, Ugo C Ugo heard it that time!

5. Or that annoying Junior WAEC that everybody did, but nobody knows the use?

I mean, who Junior WAEC epp?

6. Remember how you were just the deadest guy if you didn’t have a Blackberry?

If you weren’t pinging, what were you really doing?

7. Were you even cool at all if your ringtone wasn’t the newest popping song?

You can een record the song from the radio just to belong!

1. Those football fans that are ready to tear you slap if you say anything bad about their team

2. Those IJGB people that add ‘wanna’ ‘gonna’ to everything, just so you know they’re not from around here

3. Those Nigerian elders that are ready to starve themselves before collecting anything you give them with your left hand

4. Those Uber drivers that have everything, plus sweet, plus wi-fi,, plus hand fan in case AC is too much for you

5. Has anyone entered those corner shops that sell everything? if you want to buy jeans, nut you quickly want to make fish soup after, they have everything you’re looking for

6. Those annoying students that won’t tear the middle sheets of their notes, maybe they’re keeping it for their children to use

7. Those blessed suya men that aren’t afraid to add a little extra pepper for you, we see you guys!

1. You in real life Vs You in your selfies.

2. You, trying to get your perfect selfie angle.

3. How you look, when you try to do the duck face.

4. You, trying to look for good lighting for your selfie.

5. You, when someone photobombs your perfect selfie.

6. You, when your selfie still isn’t fine after taking 90 pictures.

7. When you post a selfie and get only 7 likes.

8. When you’re taking a selfie and your phone falls down.

9. When you’re tall and have to take selfies with short people.

10. When you buy a phone and the front camera isn’t lit.

11. You, when you finally get the perfect selfie.

But sha, you don’t have to go through all that wahala to take dope selfies. The new TECNO Camon CX has got you with its dual 16 MP Camera + customized real time portrait filters.

Click here to learn more.

The ITK

These ones know everything. Even the thing they don’t know they know. They’ll become the self appointed group leader.

The Excuse-givers

These ones will never come for meetings or they will come late and they’re always armed with one excuse or the other. “Erm, I’m sorry…my aunty’s sister’s husband’s cousin’s first son’s former classmate had chicken pox and I had to apply calamine lotion on his back every five minutes”.

The Jesters

These ones like to make everyone laugh. Their goal is to provide comic relief for the group.

The Timekeepers

They are not here to waste time. If the meeting is looking like it’s going to take longer than planned, they’re the first to let y’all know it’s time to go home.

Bye Felicia!

The Silent Ones

They’ll neither contribute nor argue with contributions made. Their own is just to come, listen and go.

PSA: What kind of team-player are you?

Join Etisalat’s EasyCliq 2.0 and enjoy all the benefits of being a cool kid. Go on now, you know you want to :’)

1. “Money is the root of all evil”

And so what? I want it like that.

2. “Money is not everything”

Money is more than half of everything, do you want to do the maths?

3. “Money can’t buy you happiness”

Explain the happiness that comes with credit alerts then.

4. When rich people say ‘I’m broke too’

You’re rich so whad you mean?

5. When someone advises you to “Save more and spend less”

What am I earning that I’ll be saving, please?

6. When your HR sends the “Salary will be delayed this month” mail

No, just carry knife and finish the work now.

7. When you’re too tired to cook and your friend says ‘order pizza now’

Order pizza and use my kidney to pay abi?

8. When traders say ”The price has increased”

It’s a crime to be poor in this country.

9. When someone says ‘Please borrow me money’

Can I borrow you what I don’t have, though?

1. So your phone’s network has vanished.

What kind of nonsense is this?!

2. At first you wonder if it’s your phone that has the problem and you get the urge to start slapping it.

The official Nigerian solution for faulty electronics.

3. Then you remember that you might break the screen by mistake and you calm down so the devil won’t use you.

There’s no money to repair screen in this recession.

4. You realize your mother was right when she said you were addicted to the internet.

But you won’t admit it to her because if you do, you’ll never hear the last of it.

5. So you decide to entertain yourself with your networkless phone to try and prove her wrong.

Where there’s a will, there’s a way.

6. You find yourself playing the 3D version of Bounce that for some reason, came with your Tecno phone.

So Tecno just stole this game from Nokia like that? Nawa oh

7. And you wonder how you even enjoyed this game back then because you’re already bored.

We didn’t have good taste back then sha.

8. You remember that you haven’t played Candy Crush since one difficult level made you quit so you go back and try that.

Ah, Candy Crush. We meet again.

9. 80 tries later, you still haven’t passed the level. Your frustration intensifies.

AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

10. You violently swear for your service provider for putting you in this position.

YOU PEOPLE THAT WORK THERE WILL NEVER KNOW HAPPINESS!!!

11. You decide to re-watch all the funny videos on your phone.

I guess it’s back to Alfa Sule…..again.

12. The videos aren’t as funny as they once were but you force yourself to laugh because you’re trying to fight the overwhelming boredom.

You’re clearly losing the battle but you keep fighting cause mama didn’t raise no quitter!

13. You pause the current video playing to wonder why you didn’t listen when people told you port to another service provider.

Had I known!

14. You start going through your picture gallery and come across a good selfie you took. This makes you smile.

See as I fine. I AM A SLAY QUEEN/KING!!!

15. You realize that the only reason you didn’t port when you had the chance was because your current service provider sells cheap data.

Awoof dey run belle. Lol

16. You decide to take this time to go through your contact list and delete people you know you’ll never call.

Olusanya Balogun. This one that I hated. DELETE!

17. Next, you start taking selfies. Boredom is slowly turning you into Bobrisky.

OSHEEEEY BARRRDEST!!!!

18. As there’s no internet to distract you, you decide to do the dishes.

Every disappointment is a blessing in disguise.

19. You also decide to cook a proper meal for yourself. Not every time noodles.

See what I can accomplish when i’m not wasting my time with the internet!

20. You quietly promise yourself that when your subscription expires you’re porting to another network.

Enough is enough.

21. Suddenly, a message comes through. NETWORK IS BACK! All is forgotten.

After all, God said we shouldn’t make decisions when angry.

23. But You SHOULD Really Consider Porting Sha

Check out all the things you stand to benefit when you move over to Etisalat’s EasyCliq 2.0. Click hereor on the ‘Learn More’ button below to find out more about EasyCliq 2.0!

1. You finally got that job, one million years after graduation.

Ope o!

2. You, when you see your mates still seeking employment.

I have arrived!

3. How you feel, when you get your first salary:

Rich gang!

4. When the oversabi 23-year-old girl in your office starts talking about pension.

Oversabi!

5. How you ball, as per, you’re not about that struggle pension life.

Pension ko, pension ni.

6. Until you visit the village and see your cash money uncle looking all broke and miserable like:

Wawu!

7. You, when you realize your uncle’s wahala is that he blew all his money without a retirement plan:

Hay God!

8. So you decide to be sharp and not play yourself because suffer-head is not your portion.

Before!

9. So you kuku start searching for correct PFAs online.

No time!

10. You, when your ARM Pension Funds start to look all nice and good.

YASSS!

11. How you sleep at night, knowing you won’t retire broke and miserable thanks to ARM pensions.

My future is safe!

Are you still wasting time? Don’t sleep in a keke, contact ARM Pensions to secure your future today. Click here to begin. You can also hit them up on Facebook and Twitter.

Pounded yam is legit the cream of the crop of Nigerian foods, argue with your cooking pot- and this delicious food combo, fresh fish Nsala soup with pounded yam, specifically from Oguta, Imo state makes us want to beg our Eastern folks to kindly kill us with enjoyment – Runtown style.

And because a food post is kinda incomplete without a recipe, we’ll be showing you how to make the tasty Nsala soup and pounded yam.

1. Apart from the most obvious ingredient (yam), you’ll need these for the soup:

2. To begin, wash and season your goat meat with dried pepper and Maggi cubes, then cook with enough water until tender.

3. Next, properly wash your fresh fish, season with the peppers, Maggi cubes, Utazi leaves and salt – cook this on low heat.

4. Add your dry fish, spices and crayfish to the pot of goat meat- let it all simmer for a few minutes.

5. While the goat meat is cooking, get on with cooking and pounding the yam.

6. Next, cut some pounded yam pieces into small balls and add to the goat meat soup. Cook on low heat for a few minutes until it starts to thicken.

7. Next, add the steamed fresh fish and vegetables and lightly shake the mixture.

8. Let it all cook for a few minutes and you’re all set to eat!

And that’s how to make a tasty pounded yam dish – Imo style!

And guess what? Clem Ohameze, one of our fave Nollywood actors, came in for a taste and he absolutely loved it!

If you want to catch the step-by-step recipe, simply watch the video below to keep up.

You can also learn about more mouth-watering meals across Nigeria on Delicious Naija, from Maggi Nigeria.

Make sure to look out for the ‘Delicious Naija’ show at these times on your TV:  7:30 pm, Friday on Arewa24,  7:30 pm, Saturday on Africa Magic (Family) , 5 pm, Sunday on NTA,  OR just watch it online right now!

1. When people meet you and instead of asking for your name, they just start calling you “Biggie”.

So you can’t even call me Dj Khaled?

2. When people jokingly compare you to Yokozuna and you laugh like you haven’t already heard that joke 2000 times.

HAHAHAHAHA!

3. When you buy food to eat and one busy body asks you if you’re sure it’ll be enough for you.

IS IT YOUR FOOD?!

4. When you catch up with friends you haven’t seen in a while and they scream about how much more weight you’ve gained.

When the truth is that you’ve been killing yourself in the gym.

5. When you’re about to sit in a chair and someone jokes about how it might break under your weight.

Saying things like this is why you won’t enter heaven.

6. When everybody thinks all your clothes are tailor made because they believe you don’t have your size in the market.

Some foolish people even go ahead and assume that tailors make your underwear too.

7. When someone offers you food but you’re not hungry so you decline and the person looks surprised.

These people think I just eat everything sha.

8. When people you don’t know start giving you health advice you did not ask them for.

This person giving you advice has never exercised a day in their life oh. They just think they’re healthy because they’re slim.

9. When you were a kid and adults would call you “fatty bumbum” because they thought it was cute.

Please stop.

10. When a bus conductor jokes about charging you for two seats.

WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME??!!!

11. When someone you don’t even know like that asks you how much you weigh.

Who are you and why do you think you can ask me such personal questions?

12. When someone jokes about how much money they could make from selling you as meat.

At least I have body. You that looks sick. If you like don’t go and eat.

13. When the car you’re travelling in stops and all the snack vendors rush to your window because they assume you would want to eat everything.

But I didn’t call any of you na!

If you were able to relate to this article and you’re looking to lose weight, then this next article could help you achieve that.

Fitfam – 7 Foods That are Perfect for Weight Loss

1. The Sleepers

They are the Head Sleepers of the Sleep Society. If you have the slight misfortune of sitting next to them, expect to have your shoulder become their pillow. You should also expect to find their slight spittle mixed lightly with sweat on your clothes.

2. The Eaters

If it comes wrapped up in something and sold in trays balanced on heads, these ones are buying. It is not wise to part them from their food. They’re generally the first to ask the driver where he is stopping to eat. Merchandise of choice usually includes but are not limited to; Gala, Chinchin, Akara and Bread, Boiled eggs, Ekpa etc. Consequently, they also will regularly request to relieve themselves on the way.

3. The Debaters

For these ones, a journey is always an opportunity to get on the debating stage, and it doesn’t take much to get them rolling.   Topics generally include any popular issue. From Daddy Bubu’s frequent holidays to the abroad to whistle-blowing and finding money in strange places. All it takes is the bus bouncing over a small pothole in the road and away they go.   But try to steer clear of the general area surrounding their mouths, they tend to be spitters as well. Although, it’s not their fault, all that talking has made their lips numb.

4. The Cellcoholic *Yes, it is a word

You can tell them by the earpiece/headset in their ears or the phone pressed tightly to their heads. From personal to business call, they’ll make it all. By the end of the journey you’ll start to feel like you know them better.   “Don’t worry Brother Ignatius, the container will come in on time”.

5. The Assistant Drivers

As the name implies, they’re the driver’s second-in-command. Usually riding shotgun, or in the row behind the driver, their functions include but are also not limited to;

• – Helping the driver see sudden, upcoming potholes
• – Warning the driver of an oncoming trailer
• – Monitoring the driver’s speed and keeping tabs on fuel level.

So the next time you’re travelling with public transport in Nigeria, keep watch for these 5 people.

And if you look closely, you might just realize that one of them is you!   Here are five other kinds of people you’ll always find in any group setting.

Check out all the things you stand to benefit when you move over to Etisalat’s EasyCliq 2.0. Click here or on the ‘Learn More’ button below to find out more about EasyCliq 2.0!

So Serena Williams is pregnant!

And the whole world is crowning her bae because of it.

  Well, maybe not everyone.

It appears she was around one month pregnant when she won her 23rd Grand Slam singles title at the Australian Open back in January.

I know! Cray cray, right? Here are 15 other hilarious reactions to the news;

1. This one is already looking for the child’s playmates:

2. But most people are simple shook over the size of her belly:

3. Shame! Shame! Shame!

4. This one found a way to drag poor Messi into the thing:

5. All you food pregnant people.

6. A great magical future seems to be awaiting the child!

7. When they congratulate you on the baby but it’s only food that is in your belly!

8. All hail the couch potatoes.

9. A little heads up for Serena’s lil’ bean:

10. Asahd! Get in here!

11. All you pregnancy calculators:

12. Real pregnancy vs Food pregnancy:

13. And now, a little throwback to the Queen Bee’s stunning pregnancy shoot.

1. The Newbies

They’re easy to spot because they obviously have no idea what they’re doing. If it’s a guy, he’ll probably be too proud to ask for help until a dumbbell crushes his big toe. This won’t happen to a newbie girl sha because chances are she’s already getting all the help she needs from the guys there.

2. The New Year Resolutioners

You usually see them around the beginning of the year. They’re the ones that make new year’s resolutions to eat healthy and exercise more so for the first few days of the year they try their best to keep this promise they’ve made to themselves. Eventually the flesh gets weak and will power dies so they vanish before the middle of January. Never to be seen again until the same time next year.

3. The Slay Queens

They’re always dressed in needlessly stylish gym clothes and are ALWAYS in full makeup. They never stress themselves too much so  their makeup won’t get ruined by sweat. You’ll find them in front of the gym mirrors, taking selfies and making Snapchat videos. This is pretty much the only reason they’re at the gym. So they can take pictures and upload to Instagram later with the caption #FITFAM.

4. The Gym Junkies

These ones know damn well what they’re doing because they’ve been doing it for years. You can’t miss them. They’re built like tree trunks. They can poke out your eye with their chest. The damage they would inflict on you, if you got in a fight with one of them, would be so great it would affect your unborn children. If you’re a newbie looking for fitness advice, don’t go to these guys. They’ve forgotten what it’s like to be new so they’ll most likely give you advice that if you follow, will end with you getting injured.

5. The Oversabis

These ones are just there to give unsolicited advice to everybody. They’re the ones that will see someone trying to lose weight and start telling them nonsense like, “You have to do 5000 power skips on one leg” OR “If you really want to lose weight you have to skip breakfast AND dinner” which of course is terrible advice. Also, under the pretext of “telling it like it is”, they can be very rude. They usually prey on the newbies.

6. The Observers

I only added this category so I could acknowledge myself. I played this role so I could write this article.   You’re welcome.

If you plan on joining #FitFam, you should read this next article so you don’t embarrass yourself when you finally join a gym.

That Time I Disgraced Myself At The Gym

1. When he checks every criteria on your list:

2. And he isn’t in a relationship, engaged or married.

3. Five minutes later, you start planning your wedding.

Every detail is already in place. You know where it will be, what the food will be like, and how the music will sound.

4. How you look at him when he’s not looking:

Come here hot stuff. Let me lick your face.

5. You turn to a klutz when he’s around.

6. You start to sweat when he looks at you.

It’s like this air conditioner is not working.

7. You try to flirt with him, but only end up looking like this:

8. And he’s like:

Girl, you okay? Is there something wrong with your neck?

9. So you give yourself a pep talk every time you’re about to go see him:

Come on girl! Get your shit together! Don’t misbehave!

10. You trying to hide your feelings for him:

11. And you debate telling him how you feel about him:

12. Then you start to write in your diary.

“Dear Diary, today Tunde looked at me for five whole seconds without blinking. Five!”

13. And you tell your girls about him:

The girl squad!

14. Then your friends start to look at him like:

15. You when you finally decide to tell him how you feel:

16. You start to drop subtle hints:

17. How you laugh at all his jokes:

Even the not-so-funny ones.

18. You take extra care to listen to everything he says.

Hmm…very interesting.

19. Your stomach starts to hurt from all the butterflies in it.

20. Your chest starts to do “gbim gbim” when he’s around.

21. He’s on your mind all the time.

Like really really. Like, like like him. Not just like him.

22. And all you’re thinking is:

Tell me baby. why don’t you just love me?!!

23. You give every girl he talks to the stink eye.

I know he says you’re his sister, but are you really?

24. When he pays you a compliment, you go to bed like:

25. You when he finally asks you on a date:

26. And if this boy you like is on social media, then this story is for you:

1. How to bathe like a pro.

Whether it’s bathing in the cold, bathing with just a bowl of water or bathing with just five minutes left before the hostel gate is closed, boarding school has taught us to live life on the fast side. So you know that harmattan showers ain’t got nothing on you, you can have your bath and rush out the house if you ever find yourself running late, and if your landlord thinks he can suffer you by locking the well and hiding the key, he’s got another thing coming, a satchet or two of pure water will be just enough to do the job.

2. How to dress even when under duress.

When there’s only two seconds left on the clock and you have to put on your underwear, slip on your school uniform, wear your socks and your shoes, and maybe even toss on a beret, boarding school has taught us that speed and agility are qualities that don’t only belong to the cheetah. So that when you find yourself running late for work, there’s no fear of showing up in the office wearing bathroom slippers for shoes.

3. How to think on your feet.

When a senior student suddenly appears in front of you and is about to send you on an errand, you have a split second to think of an excuse or risk being the J-girl messenger of the day. The ability to come up with an elaborate excuse like this, “I’m sorry Senior, I have a drug in the sickbay that I have to take every 30 minutes in front of the nurses”, will save you in many future on-the-spot moments like when you have a presentation at work, or even trying to convince a lover that you didn’t do something you both know you did but which you would very much like to get off the hook for.

4. How to be resourceful with little in order to get much.

When it’s nearing the end of the term and provisions are scarce, the “soak and travel” method of drinking garri is one example of how boarding school taught us to be careful with little so that we can get much. And this is one skill that will definitely serve well at moments when the adulting life hits hard but the pride is too much to ask anyone for help.

5. How to eat quickly so no one can join you.

In the dinning hall, there’s barely any time to eat your food. You alternate between eating standing or walking, and there’s no time to chat or take occasionally sips of water, not to talk of even read a book. This is a very important skill for life, especially when dealing with those kinds of people who actually bring a spoon when you out of courtesy tell them, “come and eat”. Ain’t nobody got time for a ration-stealer, so you cut them short. Finish the food so they can’t find anything to eat on the plate.

6. How to drink water without ever having to put your lips to the mouth of the bottle.

It’s slightly tricky and it might take some time, but eventually every boarder gets the hang of it. Tilt your head back, lift the bottle, angle it parallel to the lips, open the mouth – stylishly, not too wide like an idiot – and then pour. The key is to bring the bottle to you not your lips to the bottle. There are several benefits of this skill, and all of them revolve around it being healthy. No more shared saliva, no fear of backwash, no risk of contracting mouth diseases, if ever a life skill was needed, it’s definitely this!

7. How to tell a story and tell it well.

Much of your time in boarding school, apart of the time spent in class, running errands for seniors or serving various punishments, is also usually spent engaging in spirited conversations with classmates. A lot of gist and stories gets passed round. This is typically when the myths of the various things haunting the hostel comes out, and the people who tell these tales do so in the most captivating and enthralling way. A necessary life skill when you have to make small talk at a dinner party or gathering of otherwise boring colleagues from work. You become the life of the party, and because of the exciting stories you tell, everyone will know your name, including your boss!

8. How to pinch, manage and save for the rainy – and sometimes harmattan – day.

When you have to find a way to manage with just one pair of uniforms or housewear after all the others have been stolen from the clothes line, washing and towel-drying it so you can have something to wear the next day, you develop the ability to manage and style your one good pair of work pants in such a way that even your boss will start to wonder where you get the time to go and shop.

9. How to use the toilet without using the toilet.

When it comes to using the toilet in boarding school, it’s all about the arch. Whether it’s with a traditional toilet, a pit latrine or just yourself, a piece of paper, and the side of JSS1 block, you have to be quick, precise and careful with the arch. This is so that you make no mistake by either catching a toilet disease or tossing your “package” the wrong way when you’re done. The key is to be able to do your business as quickly and discreetly as possible. And just like being able to drink water without putting your lips to the mouth of the bottle, this life skill will definitely save you, especially when you find yourself stranded in the middle of nowhere with a broken down car and a desire to relieve yourself, or when you get mobilized and sent to an NYSC orientation camp that has more bushes than it has toilets.

If you feel these life skills are the truth, here’s more boarding school truth for you:

What other life skills did boarding school teach you?

1. When patients come in and, for some reason, insist that their illness was caused by their village people.

So why are you telling me? Please take drugs and go.

2. When a patient looks up their symptoms online before coming to the hospital so they argue with you when your diagnosis isn’t what they thought it would be.

Are you mad?! Who is the doctor here?! Oya take pad and write your own prescription na!

3. When a patient calls you “Aunty Nurse” just because you’re female.

Why have you decided to not have sense like this?

4. When you’re unlucky enough to work with incompetent nurses.

So what you’re telling me is that you went to Nursing school and you don’t know what the word, “Trauma” means.

5. When a patient attempts to compare your knowledge of drugs to that of their neighborhood chemist.

Idiot.

6. When you inevitably fall sick and people are like, “Ah . So doctor sef dey sick?”

No. Doctors are half human/half robot. I’m not sick. I just need to change my battery.

It’s hard out here for doctors sha. If you don’t believe us, read this article about the annoying patients every Nigerian doctor has treated.

16 Annoying Patients Every Nigerian Doctor Has Ever Treated

1. Mike (Nike)

via Bored Panda

Let me explain what happened here. The name of the guy that made this is Mike. He probably just slapped his name on the shoes (seeing as Mike and Nike are kinda similar) and hoped nobody would notice.

2. Sonia (Sony)

via Bored Panda

I also can explain what happened here. There was a small mix up. Sonia, is the name of the model on the pack.

3. Poly Station (Play Station)

via Bored Panda

There are so many things wrong with this. Even if you somehow believe that this is the real Play Station, NINTENDO DOESN’T OWN PLAY STATION!!! LOL

4. Heimekem (Heineken)

via Bored Panda

I’m willing to bet all the money I have in this world (N3500) that the name of the person responsible for this is Nkem.

5. Sdidsa (Adidas)

via Bored Panda

I first read this as SAMBISA and freaked out. LOL

6. Tuna, Fuma, Pama, Kuma, Punk (Puma)

via Lachschon

Loooool! They were on fire with this one.

7. Deats By Nani (Beats By Dre)

via Bored Panda

Molowo NANI!!!! LOL

8. Ghanel (Gucci + Channel)

via Bored Panda

They even combined the logos for the two brands!

9. Whatever the hell this is supposed to be (Obama+Sonic+Harry Potter)

via Bored Panda

What even is this??! This abomination is the result of of getting drunk off of cheap alcohol.

10. This Ralph Lauren Polo logo

via The Coli

The horse threw the guy off its back and is now running away because it doesn’t want to be associated with this nonsense. Lmao

Speaking of fake things, here is an article on the many ways you can spot fake Instagram vendors.

The Zikoko Guide To Spotting Fake Instagram Vendors

1. Police Court, Lagos. Circa 1910.

2. Then Alake of England, Oba Ladapo Ademola II attending the coronation of King George VI of England. London, May 1937.

3. The day before Wole Soyinka received the Nobel Prize for Literature, with other 1986 Nobel Laureates.

G.O.A.T

4. Traffic on Carter Bridge, Lagos in 1963.

5. Abubakar Rimi as Kano State Governor addressing his supporters at the Murtala Muhammed Square in Kaduna in 1981.

6. (L to R)Tanzania, Uganda, Nigeria (Rosalind Balogun) & Ghana at 1967 Miss World Beauty Contest.

Rosalind Balogun was Nigeria’s first Miss World contestant. Iconic!

7. The Kano Groundnut Pyramids in 1975.

Nigeria was the world’s largest exporter of groundnuts in the 1970s.

8. Dr. Nnamdi Azikiwe at an N.C.N.C. rally at Urualla in 1959.

9. The then Ambassador of Nigeria to the UN, Jaja Wachukwu, sleeping at the UN council meeting of October 14th,1960.

No be today our politicians start to dey mess up.

10. Then US President, Carter & wife with Shagari greeting the crowd from the White House balcony in 1980.

11. Tokunbo (Awolowo’s child) presents a bouquet of flowers to Queen Elizabeth in Ibadan 1956.

12. Kanuri Dancers in Kanem-Bornu Empire.

13. Fela performs at Berkeley, California, 14 Nov, 1986.

The then Mayor of Berkeley, California named 14 Nov 1986 ‘Fela Kuti Day’.

14. A cross-section of traders in a Kano Market in the 1960s.

15. Pope John Paul II on his way to mass in Onitsha 1982. Cardinal Francis Arinze, then Archbishop of Onitsha, to his Left.

16. Kano Indigo Dye Pits built in 1498.

The dye solution was brewed for about a month and lasted for a year.

17. The Late Lady Diana, Princess of Wales, touring Nigeria in 1990.

18. The Ebun House (85 Odunfa St.)

This house, owned by a Sierra Leonean immigrant, was the 1st 3-story building built in Lagos in 1913.

19. A Constable receives a certificate of commendation from Hon. M.A Olanrewaju, the then Minister of Police Affairs.

How hilarious would it be if present day police officers wore shorts? LOL

20. Queen Elizabeth II rides in her Rolls-Royce in Nigeria, 1956.

Can’t get enough of Nigerian history? Then check out this article about Nigeria’s iconic colonial buildings.

These Colonial Buildings Will Make You Appreciate Nigerian History

Check out all the things you stand to benefit when you move over to Etisalat’s EasyCliq 2.0. Click here or on the ‘Learn More’ button below to find out more about EasyCliq 2.0!